Goodness Gracious

Rapper Lil' Kim Gets a Year for Perjury

I think that she actually got off kind of light... so that's a good thing 'cause there was no way that she wasn't going to get any jail time. Is it wrong that I find it somewhat funny that the judge's name who sentenced her is Lynch?

Lil' Kim Por Vida!

Spain 3rd Nation to Legalize Gay Marriage

Amazing. It truly is amazing how much good Prime Minister Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero has done in the short time that he has been in power. I think that I may just love him as much as I love Barbara Boxer. Too bad our country would like for homosexuals to just not exist.

Freedom From The Press

get this-- The United States is ranked 29th in Freedom Of The Press. I bet the media won't report that either.

The Best Line...

is, of course,

"Apparently, the image of our president is as offensive to MTV as it is to me" haha

Nine Inch Nails drops MTV show over image of Bush

Can't We All Just Get Along?

Herve Villechaize feels your pain. This performance by Herve is sure to lift you up if you've got the blues.... This performance makes you think... What it is making me think about at this very moment... you'll never know...

"Why Do People Have To Fight?
Why don't they learn to do what's right?"

Hey

Even Jim Lampley Sees It :)

The Biggest Story of Our Lives

I recommend you get acquainted with The Huffington Post if you haven't already. I love Arianna. I want to run up in it.

Automated Response

He "wrote" back. I won't go into why his reponse is so stupid and deceptive (like the lack of an exception for medical bills and all of the protection/loopholes that the rich will still have, etc, etc). Not enough time.

-----------------------------
April 26, 2005
Dear Mr. Foppish (ok, I put that in there):



Thank you for contacting me to express your views regarding the bankruptcy bill. I understand your concerns, and I appreciate hearing from you.

The number of individuals filing for bankruptcy has soared in recent years, gravely affecting our nation's economy. While I agree that legitimate bankruptcy claims deserve protection, it is Congress' responsibility to address the bankruptcy system's failures. In fact, Congress has long wrestled with this policy issue and has introduced similar legislation every Congress over the past eight years. For this reason, I support bankruptcy reform.

As you know, H.R. 685, the Bankruptcy Abuse Prevention and Consumer Protection Act of 2005, passed overwhelmingly with bipartisan support in both the House of Representatives and the Senate. The Bankruptcy bill institutes a formula which takes personal circumstances into account when determining a debtor's ability to pay. The bill protects vulnerable parties, including women and children, by strengthening the child support and martial dissolution obligations in the case of bankruptcy. As a whole, H.R. 685 works to ensure fairness while maintaining personal responsibility. The bankruptcy bill was signed into law on April 20, 2005.

Again, thank you for your comments. Please do not hesitate to contact me again, on this or any other issue of your concern.
Sincerely,

Jim Costa
Member of Congress

"Jim Costa, He's Gonna Cost Ya"

What did I do for fun yesterday, you ask? Well, I sent a heated e-mail to Rep. Jim Costa that he will probably never read. Yes, I am a nerd... but, I am a pissed off nerd.
----------------------------------------------------

Mr. Jim Costa

I found it very disconcerting and, quite frankly, was appalled when I heard of your vote on the recent "Bankruptcy Bill". By supporting a bill championed by credit card companies, neo-conservatives, large corporations, and numerous other dubious entities, your vote, in no way, represented the best interests of your hard-working constituents.

As a lifelong democrat that votes in every election, I was very proud to vote for you this past November. However, I will no longer be able to support you in future candidacies. Reaching this conclusion after one vote may seem extreme, however, this was a landmark bill of great importance which will have a long-lasting (perhaps permanent) negative effect on working Americans. It is now quite evident where your loyalties reside. I will inform everyone that I know of your vote and will urge them to not vote for you when you seek re-election.

Sincerely,

RBJ

p.s. In the future, I suggest that you take some cues from house members like Maxine Waters (or even our very own Senator Boxer) and exhibit some courage and integrity.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I suppose I could have written a better, more eloquent e-mail but I just wanted to hurry and send off a message to him. It was a one-shot thing. no editing or revisions... like most of the posts in this blog.

I really do mean what I said about not voting for him again. Let's not get crazy now either, I certainly won't be voting for the republican candidate.. I'm thinking I'll vote Green or just leave that part of the ballot blank.

Amen

I wonder how many millions of people became infected with HIV as a result of his views against birth control and condoms.

Off To The Slammer

Lil' Kim Goes

I think that we can all agree that it was quite obvious that she was guilty. I wonder how much time she'll have to do? Being that she is so cute, she better watch out for the bull-dykes. I suggest she start learning how to make a shank.

Perhaps the most interesting thing about the whole trial for me was that 2 of her former Junior M.A.F.I.A. group members testified against her for the prosecution. I wonder what'll happen to them since we all know that the 'hood don't take kindly to snitches. I know that Kim doesn't seem to really like snitches. I think that she made her point quite clear on the track Notorious K.I.M. when she said;

"Never Snitch, Never send a N**GA to jail
I'd rather find him by a boat doing the dead-man's float"


Kim's Fans Threaten Rap Rats

Cronies Turn on Lil' Kim

I hope she releases a prison album!
It's O.k. I still love you Lil' Kim!

Happy Birthday Emma!

Yes Indeed

Brilliant people like this can be found all over Fresno

See Y'all Frontin' In The Street Then I Let My GAT Leak...

How could I fail to mention that there was a "near riot" at my former high school recently? Wait ...and there are fears that there may be a drive-by shooting at Edison?... This is starting to sound all too familiar...

Aww, I know now. This reminds me of the good ol' days when I attended the school...

We nearly had a riot my freshman year of high school after an anti-immigrant bill was passed under Pete Wilson. My brethren (the cholos or cholitos as we call them) were pissed, to say the least, and the only thing that was going to assuage their anger was to kick some white-ass. Being that some of those "white muthafuckas" were my friends, I had a real moment of truth. I thought to myself "If a riot does indeed break out, do I stand-up for these people who are essentially good even if their parents may not be or, because I am a brown-skinned Latino that can easily blend in, do I switch sides and spare my ass?"

Alas, a voice of wisdom stood up and spared me from having to make that decision. A young Latino thug sporting a shaved head and saggy pants spoke to La Raza and said "Hey guyz, we shouldn't kick their ass, they can't even vote. We should kick the teachers' asses!"

There was also a drive-by-shooting between the Norteño and Sureño gangs while I attended the school in which students' cars were shot up in the parking lot and an extremely obese gang member took a bullet for his "vatos". To be honest it wasn't even a drive-by-shooting-- it was more like a "bike-by-shooting". Yup, the gang unleashed a round of bullets while riding by the school on their bicycles. So ghetto. Our gangs couldn't even afford to use cars.

Addendum

Here is the Sirius page for the channel that Rude Jude is a DJ on. Apparently Rude Jude and Eminem know each other from "back in the day" in Detroit. Rude Jude, reportedly, got a shout out on one of Eminem's tracks from his first album. Since Shade 45 is Eminem's channel, I'm guessing that he hooked his homie Jude up with a job. I sure am an excellent internet sleuth on all things unimportant, aren't I?

Weekend Update

Julieta Venegas

One

She's coming to Fresno on March 24th. If you guessed that she will be playing at The Rainbow Ballroom, you are very, very smart. Trust me, she is good. The language doesn't matter. I expected not to like her at all but I was very wrong. Being that Cafe Tacuba hooked her up with her record deal, I suppose I should have known since we all know how great they are. Well, I guess that we don't all know how great they are or, actually, even know who they are for that matter... but whatever. Anywayz, go see Julieta!

Two
I expect to have a busy weekend as this just arrived for me in the mail today. I decided not to read it when it was first published since it just seemed like far-fetched gossip but now that's precisely why I want to read it.

Three

Hey, does anyone else ever wonder what happened to Rude Jude? Come on, I can't be the only one that will admit to having watched Jenny Jones on occasion.

Four

Lil' Kim's trial has kicked off

Five

and finally, the Project Runway finale was every bit as good as I had hoped it would be.

Have a great weekend everybody!

(and thanks to Mary for informing me about Julieta!)

I'm Not The Only One That Is Obsessed

Dan Renzi from Real World Miami really loves Project Runway as well. He gives a good recap. I'm so excited, Kara Saun and Wendy are going to go at it on the finale of Project Runway tomorrow night. BTW, you can totally ignore my Project Runway posts if you'd like... I realize that it all really is irrational.

SNL: Project Runway

Austin was in at least one movie

(all pretty much lifted from Dan Renzi's site)

Fresno's Answer To James Guckert

or not...

Men4RentNow

definitely not work safe
nothing in this e-mail is really


this guy claims to just be a "massage therapist". Just a hunch... but I'm guessing that those massages come with happy endings. Slim Pickins here in Fresno. Not to be "dissin'" on this guy-- he's a handsome enough fellow I guess but just 1 escort? Seriously.

I just dare you to check out the kind of rentboy selection that San Francisco and Los Angeles have. The moral of the story is this-- if you are interested in getting yourself a male hooker, it might be a good idea to go and get a hotel room in SF or LA

p.s. I'm still trying to get those horrible Guckert images out of my head

NO!!!

Hunter S. Thompson
1937-2005

Austin Scarlett

I've only admitted this to a select few but, currently, my favorite show on TV is Project Runway. Is that bad? Is that weird?

I call this fopblog and it has taken me this long to post on the biggest fop of them all... Austin Scarlett who is one of my absolute favorites of the designers. He's a sexy bitch. He pulls his look off so well. I've noticed that both Guys and Girls want to do him... he's reportedly even got straight guys rubbin' themselves. I suppose that that puts him in the same camp as Gael Garcia Bernal. Imagine having the ability to make someone question their sexuality... what power.

....

......

....

Anywayz, above all, I love that he wears his makeup and dresses the way that he does (he showed up to a reunion show looking like Cap'N Crunch) and checks himself in his compact because it really is him just giving a big "fuck you" to the world and to those that would consider him as being "wrong".

Although, he didn't make fashion week as one of the final three (that narsty bitch Wendy Pepper took his spot), he is launching a website soon and I can't wait! He also did a recent interview with The Advocate. For all of you that have missed this wonderful show, there is a Project Runway marathon today (Sunday) on Bravo. The 2-hour finale is Wednesday night.
---------------------------------------------
more project runway info:

Timmy Ray: You Go, Girlfriend!

Timmy Ray: The Austin Equation

Popgurls Interview with Vanessa

Jay McCarroll

and visit the devil herself... if you must

Wendy Pepper

One More Thing...

Of the web searches that have led to fopblog, this is one of my all time favorites

¡AY Papi!

however, people who are interested in joanie laurer's clit seem to bring me the most traffic. I must say that I understand the curiosity.

Keyes' Big Lesbian Daughter

When Alan Keyes found out that his daughter is a lesbian, he kicked her out of his home and decided not to pay her college tuition. Like Bill Maher pointed out last night on Larry King Live--- It's "hate the sin not the sinner", right? When will these people just wake up?

In Case You Still Don't Know About...

Jeff Gannon (aka James Guckert), here are some links for ya:

AMERICAblog

"Jeff Gannon's" Secret Life (Salon.com)

oh, and for another very intersting take on the scandal :), go to Democrats.com

Jeff Gannon is the reporter (white house press corp) for Talon News (among numerous other conservative news outlets) who threw softball questions at the administration... in fact, they weren't even really questions... they were more like endorsements of the their neo-con agenda as well as denunciations of those in the democratic party.

Anyway, I've always thought that "outing" someone was kind of a sleazy thing to do... however, I now realize that there are exceptions. The people that should be exposed are those who use their positions of power to spew hate at homosexuals and to discriminate against them. I mean, they may hate themselves very much but they shouldn't turn that hate on their fellow sodomites. Do you hear me, Ken Mehlman and David Dreier!?!

Sure, I'm interested in finding out how in the hell he even got into the press room to begin with-- considering that background checks are required, however, I am even more interested in finding out about his potential involvement in leaking the name of that CIA operative as well as his supposed relationship with White House Press Secretary Scott Mclellan... hey... maybe that relationship has something to do with him getting into the press room... you think?

I know what I'm doing for Valentime's Day...

(and, yes, I put that M in there on purpose)

Coast To Coast Florist

Send Barbara Boxer A Rose On Valentine's Day

---------------------------------------------------
New Development: I am now officially obsessed/addicted to using Q-Tips

A Few Links For Y'all

none of which, I'd say, are work-safe

The Game (so wrong, so distasteful, yet kind of amusing)

Holy ButtPlug!

both links are from popbitch

My Big Clit (I've not seen anything like it before)

via fleshbot
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Today, I walked behind a man in a motorized wheelchair on my way to pick up lunch. I must admit, shamefully, that I was a bit peeved because he was going slow, however, not slow enough for me to really pass him with any kind of grace--- anyhow, still being a bit annoyed, I looked down at his bumper (I guess you'd call it) and on it, it said "If you don't like the way I'm driving, get the hell off the sidewalk". Tres Amusant

Oh, and speaking of bumpers, I was flipping through the channels and, as I paused on the country music channel (as I am apt to do on occasion against my better judgment), I caught a performance of "The Bumper Of My SUV" by Chely Wright. I can understand her point about supporting the troops even if you don't support the war but, still, the song is wrong and demented on so many different levels. Check for yourself--

The Bumper Of My SUV Song Lyrics

oh and I found this little article in the Tennessean as well

Campaign of deception used to push patriotic song up charts

p.s. just an fyi-- the bitch has a horrible singing voice

p.s.s. Hey, Chely, are you really that worldly? Just curious

be back soon with more... I swear

You Have Got To Be Kidding Me

Recasting Republicans as the Party of Civil Rights

I guess that we are all supposed to pretend that the Republican party is the exact same party today as it was then. It's downright insulting. Are they forgetting their ties to the dixiecrats (Strom Thurmond's old party) and their anti-minority stances (before, during the civil rights movement, and now).

I've actually noticed this trend and, frankly, it's quite frightening. In fact, not too long ago, I saw Scarborough, on his show, imply that Barbara Boxer's questioning of Condoleezza Rice, during her confirmation hearings, had racial overtones. This is the same women (whom I love by the way... seriously... I am in love with her) who was the only senator to stand up for the vast group of black people that were disenfranchised during the November 2004 election in Ohio. That's a lot more than I can say for pretty much any Repuglican out there today.

I know that politics is just dirty in general but these neo-cons that have gained prominence within these last years are downright evil... and effective... and brilliant in a way. They know how to manipulate and exploit everything to their benefit. Through this, they brainwash and seem to do a pretty good job of gaining the public's support. I have news for the democrats-- you need to wake up NOW and figure out how to do these things too 'cause things are looking really bad and we ain't got much time.

See Any Resemblance?

I sure do. Who would have known that the banjo-playing kid from Deliverance would grow up to be president of the United States? He made a cameo appearance in Big Fish and, apparently, works in a coffee shop somewhere in the south. Why am I always the last person to find out about these things? I am aware how late I am on this story and I'm sure you all already know about this but, really, I just wanted to put the two photos next to each other. That's all. Forgive me?


oh, and here is this little piece

Oh yeah, now he says something

Kerry Addresses Voter Disenfranchisement

La Tigresa

Irma Serrano (aka "La Tigresa") is Mexico's own little Joan Rivers/Cher. She's had a lot of work done and she likes her men young. She recently married the guy in the picture and, yes, she dressed in white.

She's quite controversial down in Mexico and I have to say, she never fails to entertain me. She recently claimed that she was pregnant but, unfortunately, lost her child to a "miscarriage". Call me crazy but I'm thinking that she was never pregnant and maybe she just had the stomach flu or something.

Bush or Chimp?

This is one of my favorite political cartoons from back in the day when Homo-Marriage was all the rage

ya better give yourself a pinch...

Approximately a year ago I wrote a customer review of Peaches' "Fatherfucker" album for amazon.com (you didn't really think that I was anything but a nerd, did you?) and was rejected! I'm pretty sure that it was because of some of the content (even though they actually display the "Fatherfucker" title on their site... whatever) but it might be because I indirectly "diss" some of the other customer reviews. Anyhow, since Amazon refused to let it see the light of day, I'll share it with y'all. Many have moved on since she first came out but I am so not over her.
-----------------------------------------------------------------

--5 STARS--

Sure, there is no “F**k The Pain Away” on the latest Peaches album but, quite seriously, how often does lightning strike twice in the same place peoples? Let’s just face it, FTPA was a magical moment in music history and special moments like this are often imitated but rarely, if ever, duplicated. The truth remains though that “Fatherf**ker” is a really solid, really great genre album and, as a whole, is probably even better than “Teaches”. There ain’t a bad track on the album and she even throws a little bit more punk into the mix. With gems like “Back It Up, Boys”, “Shake Yer D**”, and “Stuff Me Up” (among others), what’s not to like?

I’ll never quite understand how someone can buy this album and actually loathe it. It’s like “what exactly were you expectin’, princess?” Next thing I’ll hear is that Gravy Train!!!! isn’t the second coming. Peaches certainly isn’t for everyone but just because her music may not fit into a particular person’s musical palate doesn’t necessarily mean that it is bad. Hey, I’m not really into Pam Tillis (well, except for maybe that one song “Maybe It Was Memphis”) but I’m certainly not in any kind of position to say that her music sucks.

I have a sneaking suspicion that some scenesters out there won’t allow themselves to like this album no matter what because some have said that the “electrochrash/crap” movement has faded and because Peaches is no longer subversive enough to like. Well, I’m gonna let y’all in on a little secret... like an O.G. (Original Gangsta), I’m an O.H. (Original Hipster) and I say it is still OK to like Peaches... for the time being at least. Might as well trust me on this one ’cause I am sooo cool/hip/apathetic that homies pay a fee just to hang with me.

To The Music. Some may think Peaches and her music are silly and mundane. Well, on the surface, they most definitely are. However, if you look a little deeper you’ll see how pre-meditated and, dare I say it, intelligent the whole thing is. The Peaches look, in itself, challenges our notion of what is seen as sexy in our society. Many will listen to the music and imagine a Britney clone and are completely shocked (and some may even be revolted) when they get an eye-full of the enigma that is Peaches. This seems to me to be quite deliberate.

The lyrics challenge gender roles/boundaries and comment on our society’s hypocritical and Victorian-esque stance on SEX ----(e.g.., “it’s ok to imply and suggest and allow people to read in between the lines but if you are upfront about sex and address it directly with no pretenses... well, OH MY GOD, all hell’ll break loose and the world will come to an end!!!!). Also, the way that Peaches objectifies men in her art is, also in turn, a kind of commentary on the objectification of women that has pervaded rap music and rock n’ roll and- come to think of it- just about every other musical genre from each one’s inception. She’s just turning the tables on all y’all bee-yatches!

As for the bare beats... I am one that is under the belief that minimalism can actually serve to enhance art. Things tend to be too muddied nowadays anyway so I’m all for stripping down the music. Also, Peaches’ lo-fi bare beats (Those drums! That low, low bass!), although almost entirely produced electronically, have a sexy primordial sensibility to them that makes you feel all weird in your tummy and (to quote a friend) gets you all squishy in your boxer-briefs. Makes you want to dance too!

Oh yeah, I almost forgot! This enhanced CD also comes with 3 Peaches videos--Rock ‘N’ Roll, I’m The Kinda, and Tombstone, Baby-- the latter 2 of which are signature Peaches Super 8’s. Good Deal.

So, hipsters- in conclusion, I say let yourselves like “Fatherf**ker”! The O.H. gives y’all permission.

Saint JuneBug

1 Night In China

I know that I am really late on this story but I was kind of reluctant to jump on the bandwagon as Joanie Laurer already receives so much shit from everyone else... I kind of felt bad for her. However, I am a horrible person whose conscience has lost the battle once again. When I heard that her clitoris looks like a jumbo shrimp, my fascination with the idea of this video grew exponentially. Anyone out there want to send me a copy? : ) I must see it for myself.

p.s. did y'all see the premiere episode of this season's "Surreal Life". Before the episode I was rather indifferent about the whole thing. I usually make an effort at being high-brow but I happened to catch it and it turned out to be, in one word, amazing. I also saw "Celebrity Fit Club" that night and there was a scene where they all had to get on this huge balancing-scale... humiliating yet brilliant.

Proud To Be A Californian

Thanks to Barbara Boxer for taking a stand last week (as well as all of the house members that stood up-- most notably Stephanie Tubbs Jones whose momma did not raise a fool) -- Boxer was the only senator to do so. She has gained my utmost respect and I am definitely proud to be one of her constituents. At the very least, the objection has been recorded and John Conyers' report has been entered in to the congressional record. Making lemonade, right?

Statement On Her Objection To The Certification Of Ohio’s Electoral Votes

C-Span's coverage of the Electoral Vote Challenge

Could It Be?

Boxer To Challenge Electoral Result?

Call Barbara Boxer today and ask her to join Representative Conyers in challenging the 2004 voting process.

please call Senator Barbara Boxer: 202-224-3553

NaNa No Fingers

I am quite serious when I tell you that my grandmother is missing two fingers on her left hand. The last two fingers to be precise-- the pinky and ring-fingers. Yup, it's true, she is a two-finger amputee.

The story goes something like this.... when my father was a small child, his mother used to work at a potato-chip factory. Well, one day while she was running the potatoes through the potato-chip-slicing-machine-thing she lost concentration for a split-second-- the machine mistook her hand for a potato and, before she knew it, the machine had hacked two of her lady-digits off. As she screamed in pain, they disappeared down the conveyor-belt. (side-note... when the family returned home from the hospital after this unfortunate event, my dad accidentally slammed the car-door on her already maimed hand. hahaho!) Of course they must have discarded that batch of potato-chips but I've always imagined that some lucky family out there got a little surprise when they opened up their bag of potato-chips at some family picnic or something.

Believe you me; The fact that my grandmother is missing two of her fingers has been a major source of personal fascination, fear, and disgust for a number of years. How could it not? Whenever I visit her I feel like I'm in a fuckin' John Waters or David Lynch film.

As a child I used to daydream a lot and you can imagine what a three-fingered granny does for one's imagination.

I'd imagine her flipping people off and giving the "ok" signal with her lame hand-- both of which she could do perfectly because it was the last two fingers that she lost on her hand-- the thumb, index, and middle finger remained in tact bee-yatches. I'd imagine her playing a guitar or flute. I'd imagine her playing cat's cradle. I'd imagine her sipping tea. I'd imagine her doing numerous things that I will not soil your mind with at this time. Oh, I actually thumb wrestled her once. that was odd.

Unfortunately, I always had trouble eating her food though. Although she was an excellent cook I would imagine her little nubs touching/handling/caressing my unprepared meal and, without fail, I would lose my appetite.

by the by-- we've come a long way, haven't we? where were these suckers when my nana got her little vienna-sausages chopped off?

Tomorrow...

Congress convenes to certify the election. Although a number of House members are prepared to challenge the results, it is uncertain if any senator will be willing to sign on to any challenge (remember Fahrenheit 9/11?). Just one senator is needed for a debate to ensue. If a senator does, in fact, signs on, I highly doubt that anything will change the fact that Bush is in the oval office, however, it may draw enough attention to the story as to, finally, get the message of the grand voter fraud in Ohio (and other places) out to a larger group of people. That said, my guess is that tomorrow will come and go just like it did 4 years ago. Bah!

Jesse Jackson Jr--Senators should object to Ohio vote

Stolen Election

Greens to U.S. Senate Democrats: Challenge The 2004 Election Certification

p.s. Sadly, it's true-- Kerry is a complete coward